Friday, April 27, 2012

No excuse for abuse!

By Mike Ullery
 Chief Photographer

Another local child has been buried, the victim of alleged child abuse.

This is getting to be an all-too-frequent occurrence at all levels of our society. Innocent children are the ultimate victims of situations where an angry or abusive adult takes out their wrath on those who cannot defend themselves.

I find myself asking, “Why, and how, do these things happen?”

Although some situations are first-time issues, I see too many times that the person responsible for the violence is a husband or boyfriend and the investigation reveals abuse that has been ongoing and long-term.

The obvious question, then, is “Why do women stay in an abusive relationship?” You will hear excuses, ranging from “I love him,” to “He promised he won’t do it again.” There are, I am sure, many cases where the abuser has threatened the life and safety of his mate should she attempt to leave.

In my eyes, there is no excuse for either mental or physical abuse of a wife or girlfriend. Neither is there a legitimate reason for someone who is being abused to stay in that situation.

When there are children involved, it is criminal for a mother to put her children in harm’s way just because she is attracted to a man, who also happens to be an abuser.

What makes some women tick, I wonder? I have seen women practically abandon their children because she fell, head over heels, for some “bad boy” type, who turned out to be a real bad boy who physically abused the children. Yet, when confronted, the mother refused to believe her “bad boy” capable of such an act — in spite of the evidence. When given a choice, her decision was to stay with Mr. Bad Boy.

I became a grandfather last week, for the 7th time, and as I look into the eyes of my newest granddaughter, I can’t help but realize the enormous responsibility put on all of the adults in her life. It is our job to protect her from harm.

Our role as parents and grandparents is no different than that of our counterparts in a pride of lions or even our own pet animals. Of all creatures on God’s Earth, there is nothing more dangerous than a mother, of any species, who feels her offspring is in danger.

Why, then, do some human females have such a tendency toward putting their children at risk just so they can gain the approval of, or be with, a man?

An excuse of “I have no one else to turn to and/or no place to go,” is just not viable today. Help is out there. All one has to do is reach out … beginning with your local police department.

Please, if you are a victim of abuse, get help. The life you save, may be your child’s.

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